Nov. 14, 2001

COLLEGE STATION - When two jet airliners crashed into the World Trade Center on the morning of Sept. 11, the whole world seemed to stop. Perception shifted again a few minutes later when a third airliner hit the Pentagon in Washington, D.C., and a fourth crashed in a field in Pennsylvania.

But the world really did go on revolving and hearts started beating again, and life – although changed – has gone on.

The initial grief may be over, but the financial impact of the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks is just beginning to be felt. Some families are getting on with the business of living. And some are not.

Why is picking up the pieces easier for some families than for others? Family resiliency is the key, said Dr. Lynn White, Texas Cooperative Extension family economics specialist at Texas A&M University.

And that resiliency can be learned from the experiences of others, she said.

"Families and businesses stressed by current events that may threaten their financial security may find lessons learned by farm families (to be) of help," White said.

"Current situations are not the same, but have ... forces at work are similar to the impact declining markets (and) weather conditions place on family farming operations.

"What farm families have learned is that often the family's attitudes and coping skills make or break their business," White said. She quoted a 1994 study conducted at the University of Wisconsin, which found families who survived the financial pressures and constant demands of farming shared the same kinds of positive attitudes. Not only were these survivors more likely to have confidence in the farming industry, but they also had faith in their own families' abilities to solve problems and cope as a family unit.

Developing this kind of attitude can be a starting point for non-farming families too, White pointed out. "This means that those of us who have confidence in our economic future will see the positive options and be less likely to feel powerless to move in a positive direction."

White offered some suggestions for developing the kind of positive outlook that builds resilient families:

- Face problems head-on and look for solutions as a family. If financial sacrifices are necessary – such as looking for new sources of income or postponing spending plans – make them as a unit. Right now the choice between spending more to fuel the economy or spending less to control debt is a decision to be faced together. Each family should look at the options these choices offer and decide what is best for them.

- Maintain a social network. Community activities can be vitally important during troubling economic times. Develop support from family, friends and community. Don't withdraw and focus only on negative options.

- Talk to others who are in the same position. Sometimes feedback from others can reveal options not previously considered.

- Remember: Rumors are usually just rumors. Don't let rumors make total fear a way of life. Be well informed; search for knowledge, not just rumor.

- Accept responsibility. Families who accept the responsibility for coping in tough times are more likely to remain united. Blaming others or going into denial probably won't help, and certainly won't make tough times go easier.

- Teach children resiliency by showing them how to solve problems and giving them positive support and togetherness.

- Use cooperation and creative brainstorming as a group to help solve family problems.

"Life offers many challenges for every family – hard work, financial risks, long hours and continual demands," said Anne Marie Marshall, University of Illinois Extension educator in family life. "During tough times, families can get through their struggles partly by accepting that hardship may sometimes be a way of life, at least for the time it takes to work out new spending, savings and debt management practices that increase your security."

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Sources:

"Farm Family Stress/Resiliency," by Ann Marie Marshall, University of Illinois Extension educator, family life

"Family Resiliency: Building Strengths to Meet Life's Challenges," National Network for Family Resiliency, CSREES-USDA Linda McGee, Department of Family and Youth Development, Clemson University